"Terrible Twos"

Jun 17
3 min read

Updated: Jun 27

I’ve heard a lot of different opinions on which age is the hardest. We’ve all heard of the infamous “terrible twos,” as many people call them. Some told me two wasn’t bad, but three would be awful. And then there were the negative Nancys who said every age is hard and it never gets easier (super encouraging, right?).

I can’t speak for anything beyond age two yet — but my two-year-old? She is WILD. It’s been rough, I’m not here to sugarcoat it. I can see how two gets a bad rap.

When we first started to notice some “bad” behavior and acting out, I honestly thought I was doomed. I believed it would never get better — that maybe I just had a “bad” kid. And that was really hard for me to accept. I was supposed to have the well-behaved child who didn’t scream or throw fits.

If you’re laughing at me right now, it’s okay — I laugh too, looking back. There are so many things I once said, “My kid would never…” to. Parenting is humbling. But especially parenting toddlers.

But the good news? So far, it has gotten better.

She still has meltdowns and tantrums. She still whines and cries about almost everything. And yes, those moments are still hard.

But I’ve gotten better too. I’ve learned how to stay calmer, how to respond instead of react. Just like our kids are learning how to be humans — we’re learning how to be parents.

I think sometimes we forget that our babies are still so young. My daughter has only been on this earth for two years. That’s barely any time at all. It’s definitely not enough time for me to expect her to act “perfect.”

(And just so we’re clear — I’m preaching to myself here.)

I’ve been alive for 26 years and I still mess up constantly. We’re not here to scold our kids into obedience — we’re here to teach and shape them. Yes, there’s a time and place for discipline. But I truly believe there’s a calm and loving way to help guide them toward what’s right.

The one thing I cling to in the hardest moments is grace.

In the Bible, grace is defined as God’s unearned, undeserved favor. It’s love and mercy freely given — even when we fall short. We are His children, and He loves us endlessly.

Our children deserve that same unconditional love and grace.

If you’re struggling with a toddler right now — or honestly, any age or stage of parenting — and you’ve heard all the horror stories, or people have told you it never gets easier, I want you to hear this:

It gets easier.

Or at the very least… it gets different.

I’ve only been a mama for two years, so how do I know? Truthfully, I don’t. But I choose to believe that things get better. That growth happens. That God shows up in the mess.

Yes, there will always be hard seasons — that’s life. But we have to be able to find the good too. What kind of life are we living if we’re constantly dreading what’s ahead?

I choose not to listen to the negative voices.

My God is a God of hills and valleys. He’s with me no matter where I am.

Even in toddler tantrums, even in the chaos that others may think is insignificant, I choose to seek Him.

God wants to hold us in the big and small moments. Even in the kitchen with a crying toddler at your feet.

So yes, I have a “terrible two”-year-old.

But the truth is — she’s not terrible.

She’s just two.

She’s learning how to be human. She’s learning how to regulate emotions & navigate feelings — something I still struggle with, if I’m being honest.

Some people may only see the tantrums.

But I see a kind, beautiful, hilarious, and brilliant little girl.

I see a future world-changer.

She is perfectly imperfect — and so loved.