To the Overwhelmed First-Time Mom

I saw a first-time mama today, and I could just tell… she was stressed, tired, overwhelmed. Her baby wouldn’t stop screaming, and all I could think was: man, I remember that feeling all too well.

I remember the days of constantly thinking, “This is my life now. When does the hard end? How are other moms doing so well? I want to give up.” Trust me, I’ve thought all the thoughts—so much so that my husband was seriously worried about my mental health.

So when I was expecting my second baby, I was terrified those feelings would come back. But God had already taught me so much through my first child, Ellie. She was honestly such a hard baby. I love her more than anything in this world, but those first few months? Whew… I was struggling.

She screamed in the car, at home, even in my arms. Nothing seemed to calm her. I remember sobbing so many times because I just couldn’t figure out how to make her feel better. I remember my first time going to see a friend with her and having a panic attack for no reason. I remember pulling over on the side of the road over and over, just to try to calm her cries because I couldn’t bear to listen to them anymore. I couldn’t even make the 10-minute drive to Walmart without pulling over—and this went on for months.

Finally, around month four, things started to get better. We discovered she was sensitive to dairy and a lot of the foods I was eating. She was the gassiest, most sensitive little thing. She still cried a lot, but we finally felt hopeful that it would get better.

But for a long while, I truly believed I would never feel like myself again—that I’d never have a peaceful moment.

I’m only six months postpartum with my second baby now, and yes—I still get stressed, overwhelmed, and exhausted. But the difference is, I know the beauty of the other side. I know that peace does return. I know that you find a rhythm. I know that life starts to feel lighter again.

So mama, if you’re in the thick of it, please hear me: it does get better.

I know people say that phrase so casually, like maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not. But I promise you—it is true.

You’ll eventually feel like a human again. You’ll find your new routine as a mom. You’ll continue living your life, just with a tiny best friend by your side. You’ll still be you—but with a little more wisdom, a little less sleep, and a whole lot more love.

And I want you to know: you are not alone. Not in your tiredness, not in your anxiety, not in your overwhelming sadness that doesn’t even make sense sometimes. Almost all of us have been there. Some just choose not to talk about it. And honestly, some people handle this drastic life change more easily than others. Please, please don’t compare yourself to them.

It’s okay to struggle. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. There’s nothing wrong with you.

That’s why I want to share my story. Because maybe what you’ve gone through, or are going through right now, is exactly what another mama needs to hear to keep going. I know I could have used that two years ago, in one of the hardest times of my life.

We don’t need to pretend everything is perfect. Let’s be real. Let’s encourage each other, share the struggles, and remind each other that it’s okay to not be okay.

I struggled with postpartum depression heavily, though I was in denial for a long time. Thankfully, my husband and my family helped me overcome it. But it was hard.

So if you are struggling too, please don’t keep it bottled up. Talk to someone. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to family or friends (and I get that), talk to your doctor. Don’t be ashamed. Asking for help doesn’t make you weak—it makes you brave. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be the best version of yourself for your family.

So to the mama who feels like she’s drowning: if no one else has told you today—

You’re doing amazing.

Keep going.

It really does get better.